“I’m sorry, Stevie.”

“I’m fucked up.”

“Why do you love me?”

Whenever Bucky woke up from a nightmare, Steve’s heart broke. He couldn’t bear to hear the things that his best friend sobbed and choked out while he rocked himself. Steve wasn’t sure what Bucky needed in these situations, so most of the time he ended up rubbing his back and trying to keep his distance in case Bucky didn’t want to be touched. He would tell Bucky ‘It’s not your fault,’ but he never believed him. Steve felt useless, but… it was the best he could do when his boyfriend was unstable.

One night, when Steve was awoken when Bucky let out a cry and jerked up in bed, he immediately sat up and hugged the man to him. He couldn’t care less if he lashed out at him. 

Bucky shuddered and cried, wiping his eyes in frustration. All the while Steve rocked him, petting his hair and whispering to him. He whispered to him how much he loved him, how much everyone loved him. How much he was valued as a member of a team- of a family. He kissed his forehead, his cheeks, his nose. He just wanted Bucky to know how much he mattered.

After a few minutes of this, Bucky’s breathing calmed and his tears dried up. He looked up to Steve, but Steve couldn’t tell what he was feeling. Was he happy? Upset? Confused?

Steve’s questions were answered when the man’s face cracked into a smile and he said hoarsely, “I love you.”

[ want this? ]